finalized.

Things will be finalized in about a week or so. You know, the feeling is just ... I don't really know how to put it in words, but it just breaks me that soon, I'm finalizing the decision to end the engagement, instead of finalizing how my wedding dress is going to be like, the decor, the caterer, and .. you'll get what I mean.

You see, the point is, I didn't really want to leave. But I told myself, when will enough be enough?

I seriously don't deny that I still do think about him every now and then. In fact, every .. single ... day. I don't know what I'm missing to be exact, I'm not sure if I'm missing him as a person, or just the happier times we once shared. But thing is, how long should I endure being treated this way? A friend of mine will definitely feel my pain. I could be as independent as I want. But in a relationship, I deserve to at least get credit for being a lady, and I shouldn't be the dominant one.

The only thing I appreciate about him is that he'll go the extra mile to help me. To be my despatch, be almost at my every beck and call when I know he's free. But that's about it. I can always pay someone to be my despatch, but guess the affection is not there with a stranger. He's also the water when I'm the fire. But his kind of water is pretty frustrating.

I have been so demoralized to the point that I no longer see the good in him. That I started to fear that the next few guys after this will just be the exact carbon copy of him. Malays, I thought. Most of them are good for nothings. And that the good guys are all already taken.

It saddens me how 4 years ago I used to be this girl with big ambitions and dreams to achieve. How I wanted a lovely family, live in my own house, raise awesome kids together, see my children grow. But now that I'm going to be 25 this year, I absolutely have no dreams. I know that I may still be "young", that it's still not to late to get to know new people, but I'm past the age whereby i told myself "I want to have kids by the time I'm 25".

Yes, I'm a boring person I admit. That I have absolutely no life and look forward to tie myself down to be a family woman. But I don't see any wrong in it. True enough, life as a married woman (subsequently with kids) ain't really a stroll in the park. But I look at things in a different prospective: Whilst children's cries can be annoying and frustrating at times, I see the joy in seeing their innocent antiques, reactions, I see joy in seeing them grow, and knowing that these children are of my flesh and blood, it makes the bond much more special.

I'm not sure how I'm going to mend this broken heart. I've been going out and meeting some old friends, but then again, I do still think of him. I've even been drowning myself with work. I've trouble sleeping. I've trouble eating.

I wished I had you back. But I know, things will never be the same. But I know, I could never get what I always wanted out of you. I thought you'd be different and proved others wrong. But you proved others right.

I really... really... really have no idea how I'd get back up.
):

For my baby gixxer ....

And so my mind has been set. am changing my decal to roughly the same color theme as above. and tweak slightly. few logos in pink with black base, plus my shortform name "ZLHA.Y89".

and ... i'm done.

Paycheck + 1 month bonus is today! shall head to the shop next week! teeeheee omg can't wait!

Gold Goast Day 1: Catching the Vibe into Seaworld!

From Gold Coast Airport, we took the public bus to get to our hotel. Thankfully, the bus drivers there were friendly people! Oh, remember to take all sorts of brochures and flyers from the information counter at the airport to help further plan your itineraries whilst on your trip.

We were split on whether we should get the Gold Coast shuttles for unlimited transfers anywhere we want to for AUD$100. But guess we settled for normal public bus fares. Not to worry if you don't have the GO card (something that works like the ezlink card in SG and the Octopus card in HKG), the bus drivers have exact change for you! Just be nice and standby smaller notes for them ya.

Anyway, we took bus service number 702 from Airport that goes to Southport with stops in between. Hey, it's a public bus right. Just tell the driver where you're going, he'll tell you what to do from there. So, the conversation goes something like this ..

Me: Hello!
Driver: Good day mate!
Me: Does this bus go to the Vibe Hotel?
Driver: Yeap! Your stop is at Cavill Avenue, get down there when I call out the stop aite! So your fare's AUD$9.20.

Sure enough, he called out the stop, and even mentioned Vibe hotel, your stop's here! The journey took from the airport to our hotel was about 40-50 minutes, not so sure because my phone batt died on me!

Once at the hotel, we just did an arrival check-in as we were'nt allowed to check-in into our rooms just yet. Mind you, we reached the hotel at about 9.30am in the morning and check-in isn't until 2pm. So we just deposit our luggage with the hotel's reception and head to Seaworld since it's the nearest to our hotel.

Tadaaaa! I'm here again after 13 years teehee. Okay okay, so how did I get to Seaworld? I took the public bus. Yea, again! Took 950 from the bustop near our hotel for only AUD$6.10. (Take note that it's another AUD$6.10 to go back from Seaworld to my hotel.)

So once reached, we bought the passes for the 3 theme parks for the price of one. WHICH IS ALOT OF SAVINGS. Entry into JUST Seaworld alone costs AUD$89.99. Buying passes for Seaworld, Movieworld and Wet'n'Wild only costs AUD$99.99!!! That's almost 3 themeparks for the price of one! Of course there's a catch, you'll have to visit the themeparks on 3 consecutive days. Which is absolutely possible!

Seaworld is basically a place to chill and unwind to look at the animals and shows. We reached just in time for the Spongebob Paradepants. I love the catchphrase during the initial start of the show. It goes something like "Welcome to the Annual Spongebob Paradepants, now on daily." teeeheee. Notice the irony? Anyway, to prevent my blog from having so many images, I've decided to combine the pictures together. Click on the individual pictures to enlarge yo!

Spongebob Paradepants!

Ooooooooo~ Who lives in the pineapple under the sea ....?

Up next, there's the Jetstunt Extreme. AWESOME PAWSOME! Makes me want to learn how to jetski please! The stunts, they can even do a 360 degrees flip on their skis! Anyway, we bought some chips to fill our stomachs whilst waiting for the stunt show to start. It's wise to pack a packet of wet wipes because the sitting area that shows the Spongebob Paradepants and the Jetstunt extreme has alot of erm ... seagulls? okay lets just say BIRDS flying around that area. and you know what birds are best at doing right? YEAP, BIRD POOOOOOO ! In case you're not so smart and wondering what are the wet wipes for, it's for wiping the seats off bird poop because they're literally everywhere!

So next is the jetstunt~!

Once done, me and my friends just took a stroll at Seaworld and watched the animals there. They had penguins, polar bears, sharks etc. There was even the part where you can touch the starfish and sea cucumbers! Didn't manage to catch the little polar bear cub though.

Then the best part of Seaworld that's a MUST-GO to if you're there.

IMAGINE DOLPHIN SHOW!

I was recording video throughout the Dolphin presentation thus the lack of pictures. I managed to capture awesome shots back in 2000 but unfortunately we lost our camera in Brunei. Totally inspiring, truely calming to see these dolphins put up such acts.

Luckily, we lasted the whole day at Seaworld and managed to go to each animal encounter. Had to skip some of the rides because the queue was horrendous and time doesn't permit us. It started to pour when we were making our way back to the main entrance, just in time before the park closes.

So a tip or two when going to Seaworld, pack yourselves sunblock, hat, and an umbrella! oh, and wet wipes!

FYI, it's quite a distance to walk from the bustop to the park. To get back to the hotel, we took the bus at the same spot where we alighted earlier on. When in doubt, just ask the locals, preferably someone who's in Seaworld's uniform as any ang-mohs can easily be mistaken as a local (but in actual fact they're tourists themselves!)

Bus-ed 750 back to Vibe hotel and finally checked into our rooms!

It's quite spacious for two person. The TV is placed on a revolving stand so you need not necessarily be on the couch to enjoy your TV. there's also a balcony that faces the beach. AWESOME! Ironing board, iron, hairdryer, towels and toiletries are part of the package.

Anyway, had a long day since our flight. Gonna have our rest. Toodlez~!

Let's SCOOT ... to Gold Coast!

It was an impromptu decision made late last month to travel to Gold Coast in January. We tried to avoid the November-December period since it's the Schoolies week. (Read: Schoolies week in Australia)

But because it was real late to find a cheap flight to Australia, our last resort was to fly Scoot! my second budget airline in my entire life. Emirates was going at around SGD$800, it was much cheaper than JetStar (which was SGD$1000+!) and it's a direct flight into Brisbane.

So anyway, checked in at Changi Airport's Terminal 2 about 8.30pm. There wasn't any queue and I thought I was late! Flight was scheduled at 10.30pm. And it departed right on time.

And because it's a 7.5 hours flight journey, we opted for FlyBagEat. Even though it's a night flight i did get famished along the way. Pre-ordered mutton briyani and the packaging is soooo tiny!

Anyway, we were lucky there wasn't anyone sitting next to us so the 3 seats on our side of the row practically belong to us! We were free to sit however we want to and we could sleep comfortably and not only confined to our seats.

By the time we knew it, we were already reaching Gold Coast. Do note that Scoot flies direct to Gold Coast and thus you'll save alot of time travelling from the airport to the heart of Gold Coast. I remembered myself taking about 1-2 hours of travelling to get from Brisbane to Gold Coast itself!

It was quite a smooth landing by the Captain of TZ 002. Bloody colleagues was scaring me telling me budget airlines always land rough. grr!

Anyway, Gold Coast (or more accurately Coolangatta airport) is quite a small, budget terminal. So upon arrival, you'll need to get through the tarmac. No phones or cameras are allowed on the ground, the airport staff will practically shout into your ears if you had any in your hands.

The waiting time to clear immigration took quite a while though. Do note that you can get your passports checked as a group even if you're travelling with your friends, partner, families. Yeap, more than 1 person can be at the immigration counter at any one time! Something that obviously we Singaporeans aren't familiar with because by hook or by crook, no matter if we're travelling with our partners/friends/families, we would have to clear immigration one by one.

Anyway, done with Part 1 of my first day Gold Coast Scoot experience. Stay tuned for more Gold Coast posts!